The History of Mail-Order Brides

The American Frontier: The Original Mail-Order Brides

The concept of mail-order brides in America began in the mid-1800s. As men moved west to stake their claims on the frontier, they quickly encountered a problem: there were very few women. These settlers, farmers, and miners were building new lives but had no one to share them with. They were not looking for a servant; they were looking for a wife, a partner to build a family and a future with.

The solution was to advertise in newspapers and magazines back East and even in Europe. Women, who were often in situations with limited economic opportunities or marriage prospects, would respond to these ads with letters and photographs. If the correspondence was successful, the woman would make the arduous journey west to marry a man she had never met in person. This was not a transaction; it was a practical arrangement based on a mutual desire to build a family.

The 20th Century: Paper Catalogs and a Changing World

The practice evolved throughout the 20th century. After World War II, many American GIs returned home with foreign brides they had met while stationed abroad, further normalizing the idea of international marriage. By the 1970s and 1980s, the “mail-order bride” industry began to formalize with the creation of paper catalogs. Agencies would photograph and write profiles of women, primarily from Southeast Asia, and compile them into catalogs for Western men to browse. Men would then pay a fee to correspond with the woman of their choice.

The Fall of the Iron Curtain

A major turning point came in the early 1990s with the collapse of the Soviet Union. Suddenly, millions of educated, intelligent, and beautiful women from Russia, Ukraine, and other Eastern European countries were able to look for partners outside their borders. This created a massive new supply of women for the industry and a previously unknown demand from Western men who were captivated by their Slavic beauty and traditional values. This event is what truly launched the modern era of international dating.

The Internet Revolution: From Catalog to Clicks

The rise of the internet in the mid-1990s completely revolutionized the mail-order bride system. What was once a slow, expensive process conducted through letters and printed catalogs became instant, accessible, and far more efficient. This digital shift changed everything:

• Instant Communication: Men and women could now chat in real-time, send emails, and eventually, engage in video calls.
• Greater Choice: Instead of a static catalog, men could browse thousands of profiles on a single website.
• More Control for Women: Women were no longer just a picture in a catalog. They could create their own profiles, proactively message men, and have much more agency in choosing a partner.

What “Mail-Order Bride” Means Today

It is critical to understand that you **cannot buy a foreign bride.** The term “mail-order bride” is a relic of the past that has stuck around. In today’s world, the process simply refers to using a specialized international dating site to find a wife. It is not a transaction; it is a service.

The Modern Process:

1. You join a reputable website.
2. You browse profiles and communicate with women who are also looking for a serious partner.
3. You build a genuine relationship over time.
4. You travel to meet her in person.
5. If the connection is real, you get engaged and apply for a fiancée visa (like the K-1 visa in the US) to bring her to your country legally for marriage. We cover this in our K-1 Fiancé Visa Guide.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is the term “mail-order bride” offensive?

Many people find the term offensive because it implies that a woman is a commodity to be bought. While it’s still widely used in search engines, it’s more respectful to use terms like “international dating” or “seeking a foreign wife.”

Is it legal to marry a “mail-order bride”?

Yes, it is 100% legal to marry a woman you meet through an international dating site, provided you have a genuine, bona fide relationship and follow the legal immigration procedures of your country, such as the K-1 Fiancé Visa process in the U.S.

How much does a “mail-order bride” cost?

You are not paying for a person. You are paying for the dating service, travel expenses to meet her, and visa/immigration fees. As we detail in our international dating cost guide, a realistic budget is between $8,000 and $20,000 from start to finish.

What was a “picture bride”?

This was a term used in the late 19th and early 20th centuries, particularly for Japanese and Korean women. Marriages were arranged based solely on the exchange of photographs between the woman and a man who had immigrated to America.

How did the internet change the industry for women?

The internet gave women far more power and safety. They could create their own profiles, see detailed information about the men, communicate directly, and make their own informed choices, a huge improvement over the old catalog system.

Why do women sign up for these services?

The motivations are diverse. As we cover in our guides to Russian and Latin women, common reasons include a lack of suitable local men, a desire for a more stable and respectful partner, and an attraction to Western culture.

Are these relationships successful?

Studies have shown that marriages arranged through these services have lower divorce rates than the general population. This is often attributed to the high level of intention and clear communication about goals (i.e., marriage) from the very beginning.

What is the most popular region for finding a foreign wife today?

Southeast Asia (particularly the Philippines and Thailand), Eastern Europe (particularly Ukraine), and Latin America (particularly Colombia) are the three most popular regions for Western men.

How do I choose a reliable site?

Choose a site with a long history, positive reviews, identity verification features, and transparent pricing. Avoid sites that feel “too good to be true.” We review several top options in our guide to the best international dating sites.

What is the first step to start my own search?

The first step is to do your research (like reading this article!) and then choose a reputable dating site. Creating a sincere and detailed profile is the most important action you can take to attract a genuine partner.